Sam. Conqueror. Overcomer.

"IN ALL THINGS WE ARE MORE THAN CONQUERORS THROUGH HIM WHO LOVES US : Samuel was born on 15th May 2009, two months early and in respiratory distress. After an initial Apgar score of 1, he was taken to the NICU and placed on a ventilator, together with an undeterminable amount of tubes, IV’s and monitors which made it almost impossible to see the little Smurfie character lying within…slightly blue and only three apples high. Sam was diagnosed within 24 hours with Rubinstein-Taybi Syndrome, a scarce medical advantage as, due to the rare occurrence of the Syndrome and the limited medical literature on it, many individuals are only diagnosed well into adulthood and some never at all. The page-long list of medical/health issues related to the syndrome, while vital in providing a prognosis and compiling a care plan, took a backseat, however, as Sam’s struggle to breathe and swallow became the primary focus of our concerns and prayers, deepened only by the heartache of not being allowed to hold and comfort him for the first ten days of his already traumatic life. After seven weeks Sam was successfully weaned from the oxygen but was still dependent on a nasal gastric tube for feeding, with which he was eventually discharged. Once home, what should have been a precious time to recover from the stress of the NICU and enjoy a relaxed and cherished time together, instead became a seemingly-endless timeline of specialist appointments, therapies, illnesses and surgeries as that page-long list of medical complexities came into play, affecting every part of Sam…physically, neurologically, medically and emotionally. Yet, despite these challenges and an “ineducable” future being predicted when his prognosis was delivered, Sam showed a delightful potential and eagerness for learning. Unfortunately though, this learning potential seemed limited to his cognitive abilities as, physically, Sam’s development lagged significantly behind that of his RTS peers. A week before his 5th birthday a brain MRI confirmed that, in addition to the RTS, Sam also has Periventricular Leukomalacia and Static Leukoencephalopathy (included under the umbrella diagnosis of Cerebral Palsy), which would more than likely have occurred as a result of the oxygen deprivation experienced leading up to and/or during his birth. Thirteen years later and with a number of surgeries and medical procedures which appear to be in fierce competition for their own “page-long list” (which surgeries and their subsequent recoveries have left Sam to face his day-to-day life with a residue of unshakeable anxieties and phobias), the boy you meet face-to-face…with his cheeky sense of humour, unfathomable joy and fierce warrior spirit…make it almost impossible to believe that that disheartening brain MRI and poor medical prognosis are of the same kid. As we begin to navigate this journey with a newly aged differently-abled teenager, leaving behind the little smurf whose fears and discomforts could so easily be remedied with a cuddle on mom’s lap, the anxiety of more surgeries and medical challenges now compounded by the universal fear of every differently-abled child’s parent/s (who will take care of their child once their own time here is gone) threatens to become overwhelming. But then the excitement of a horseriding lesson, the sheer delight of spotting a balloon (especially a hot air balloon) or a super silly giggle caused by simply hearing someone sneeze provides a beautiful reminder of the profound joy and courage these children radiate, despite their overwhelming challenges, and it provides the perfect encouragement and inspiration for facing your own. #samtheconqueror
SAMUEL - COMPLETE IN GOD
Our world has crashed, been blown apart.
This can't be happening....why us? Why now?
Your fragile life shaken before it could barely start,
How do we get through this...please, Lord, tell us how?

Drowning in our sorrow, waiting for answers that just don't come.
Our baby "special needs"? It simply can't be true!
The heartache overwhelms us, we're left feeling cold and numb.
The diagnosis tells us little - these children are so few.

But then we finallyget to touch you, to see your precious face
And all the heartache and questions fade, replaced with love and pride.
It's obvious from the very start you're showered in God's grace,
And with His love and guidance, we'll take this challenge in stride.

When once we couldn't pronounce it, Rubinstein-Taybi's become our norm.
When once the future seemed dark, we now welcome the journey as having an RTS angel brings lessons in unexpected form.

Our world has crashed, been blown apart!
This IS happening....to us.....right now!
We've been blessed with a gift, so precious from the very start. How do we get through this? Here's how.....
By believing in a God, so merciful and great,
By trusting that He's right beside us as we journey through the narrow gate.
By believing His love for us is not determined by a human frame,
By trusting that we draw Him near by merely calling His name. This precious baby we asked God for,
Prayed he'd be perfect and complete.
And, as Samuel means "God hears", He's laid His answer at our feet.

(Nicky de Beer : 27/05/2010)

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

In the past fourteen days......

...we've had two speech therapies; one occupation therapy; one very tearful and tantrum-filled physiotherapy; Meghan's school Christmas concert (which had been performed for us as at home several times by then); attended an awesome Saturday morning breakfast at our church blessed with an equally awesome message about clay pots; attended a surprisingly undisturbed sermon the following morning with the help of some chocolate (Yes, at 9:30am); had two ENT consultations - one for myself and one for Sam where it was found that Sam once again has fluid in his ears; spent several days (yet again) filled with frustration as to why grommets/tubes were not inserted into Sam's ear when he happened to be in a hospital; in a theatre, under anaesthetic, accompanied by a letter from another specialist explaining the extensive problems Sam had had with his ears over the previous four months, surrounded by both the necessary equipment as well as the necessary specialist having another ENT procedure; had an appointment with Sam's urologist; tentatively scheduled the removal of the right testicle for the week of 12 - 15 December; realised that if Sam's ears don't clear up by then and grommets need to be inserted shortly, he will be having two anaesthetics barely a month apart; spent another couple of days moping about why it seems to be impossible to simply choose just ONE hospital and take it for granted that EACH AND EVERY specialist there will attend to your child with an equal balance of professionalism, expertise and (last but certainly not least) a comforting degree of compassion and consideration; then spent several hours appreciating how blessed we are that, despite not being able to co-ordinate all Sam's surgeries or even follow-up appointments, we have managed to find some of the most professional, expert, compassionate and considerate specialists available here; attempted to update this blog a minimum of five times; deleted a minimum of five draft posts due to the content thereof becoming irrelevant in the time it took to actually publish; spent several hours hunting down the latest craze in Meghan's clique being "teachers pets" (awesome littly fuzzy creatures with teeny weeny little booklets inside on all sorts of things like learning how to draw, magic tricks, jokes, etc); bought yet another new pram for Sam in the hope that this one will indeed meet Sam's sensory defensive requirements; had a GP visit for Meg who is fighting a particularly troublesome URTI; discovered the Talking Tom iPad app; spent several hours watching Sam grow addicted to the Talking Tom iPad app and all this without taking into account the time it took to give Sam 70 odd bottles, change close to 100 nappies, spend a minimum of fourteen hours putting Sam to sleep, 21 hours feeding him his porridge/food and all the other trivial tasks like stimulating play, sensory brushing, bottle-washing, formula making, supper making, etc.

Phew....now I don't feel so bad about not having updated his blog in fourteen days :-D

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